Don't Google Your Symptoms, Friends.

Last night, upon realizing that my throat was sore, I thought, "Oh, no.  What if I have cancer?  What if I DIE?"

This is a common concern for me, dying.   What with two small children and a husband and all.

But then, a miracle occurred.  This came next: "Well, if I'm dying, I wouldn't do anything differently than I am right now." 

This blew my heart open. 

It made me teary and chills-y and peace-filled. 

I told Tim.  He got all those things, too. 

The thing that rocked me most was the awareness that my life is perfect - perfect  - exactly as it is.  In it's messy regular-ness.  In the relationships to work on, defense mechanisms to unwind, more love to offer, less impatience to exhibit.

But also in the desire to do the work of making things better, a little bit each day.

And while desire doesn't lead to immediate success, it's certainly the place to start. 

Funny what a little pollen can do. 

*E